family

The Holiday Season – Adopting a New Family Member

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The Holiday Season is here, whether you celebrate Christmas, Hannukah, Kwanza, or some other holiday, this is often a time for adopting a new family member, one with four legs. This always seems like a fun thing to do. A way to share our love. Possibly a way to teach other family members responsibility. But before we share our love, it is a time to think about whether we are ready for the new family member and what this involves.

The most common new family members are dogs and cats. Before we welcome them into our lives, we need to think carefully about what this means. Along with all the good things like unconditional love, someone to greet us at the door, someone new for companionship and play, there are also new responsibilities and new costs. Who will be responsibility for walks, both morning and evening, and possibly the associated training? Who will clean up if accidents occur? Who will take care of food and drink for the new family member? Many of the same questions we would need to ask if we were welcoming a new human family member.

This new four-legged family member may soon conclude that he or she now owns the home and we, with only two legs, are there because they welcome us. Can we accept that? Where will the new family member live and what rules will be in place? And who will enforce the rules and how? Violence and abuse are not acceptable answers. If we already have other pets, will there be peace at the arrival of the new stranger or will there be war, or at least minor battles? We should ask, and honestly answer, these questions and many others before the adoption occurs.

Why? Because, unfortunately, many of these adoptions result in the returning the new family member, often the day after their arrival, or, even worse, their abandonment or death,

Later today, or possibly tomorrow, I will be writing a review of a book I recently read, W. Bruce Cameron’s “My Three Dogs”. While the book is fiction, it could as easily have been true with only a few changes including the common disclaimer, “Names have been changed to protect the innocent (or guilty).” If you or anyone you know is considering an adoption over the holidays, I would strongly recommend that you read this book first.

If you have asked yourself these questions, and still believe that you can accept a new member to your family I welcome you to the world of pet-owned people. I hope you have a wonderful life with your new “boss” and enjoy all the time you have together with him or her.

Happy Holidays!

Hopes and Fears for Christmas Yet to Come

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As I lay in bed this morning, wide awake far to early, I was visited not be the ghost of Jacob Marley nor of one of Dickens’ spirits but instead by one of our cats. Usually, he lies beside me in the bed, my wife says from love while I say to keep warm. In this case, I was snuggled next to my wife and he decided to lay on top of me and stare at the two of us. Could he be jealous or can cats even have such human feelings. After a short time, he left to do other more important things like using his litter box, having a drink, and making sure his food bowl was empty. One wonders what goes on in the mind of a small, furry creature like this and why they can become such an important part of our lives.

As you my have noticed, I again borrowed a part of the name of a Dickens’ spirit again today. I thought this appropriate since Dickens inspired both this and the previous two posts. When I think about Christmas, I feel the need to look at it not just from the way it is today, or even when I was a child or when Dickens published “A Christmas Carol” just over two hundred years ago, but also what Christmas in the future. The present and the past seem easy to consider but the days yet to come present a much greater challenge. There are hopes for things good and fears of things that may be bad. While I may be here for part of the future, it goes far beyond that time and many changes can and will occur.

When we think about the meaning of Christmas, we must recognize that it is a religious holiday. While it serves the Christian faith, does not have the same meaning to others who also have religious or cultural observances like Hannukah and Kwanza. Yet even these others, even those who profess no faith, often celebrate Christmas with us.

Family – As families and friends, Christmas has served draw us together and make us closer. A time of celebration and a time to put differences aside. Yet today, there are those – editors, opinion columnists, broadcast media, celebrities, and others – who would like to use Christmas as a time to drive wedges between us. They do this not for the benefit of anyone other than themselves; to create an elite class which uses others only to serve them and comply with the views and beliefs. If we allow these “elite” to succeed, then the need for the familial unit will disappear. As suggested by some of these “elites” we should cancel holidays because they allow or even encourage sharing amongst those with differing views. This is a great fear for me.

At the same time, I have great hope for Christmas Yet to Come. Why do I say this? It is very simple. If one looks at history, something seemingly unimportant today, efforts to drive wedges between people, friends and families, have occurred many times in the past. Often these efforts have led to battles and wars. No one should say that war is good, but at the end of war, or even the end of arguments, we humans seem to be able to put aside our differences and the world moves forward. This can even be seen in the lives of the very young where schoolyard arguments seem so important but are often forgotten within a few minutes. So, hope should exist. Those who attempt to drive wedges, as an “elite” or with their support, should be shunned and pushed aside. Let us have hope for the days yet to come.

Santa and His Helpers – Santa and his helpers are, perhaps, a fantasy. They exist in the world of children. Children who should not, at an early age, need to be faced with all the challenges of adults. While Santa’s origins may be clouded in mystery but there seems to be at least two common threads. First, is the celebration of Saint Nicholas. This is a day celebrated more in Europe than elsewhere which honors the work of St. Nicholas. If one reads more about this day, one can find things that have resulted in our Santa of today. The giving and the sharing, the need to be good, and even Santa’s name. Second is a poem published anonymously in 1823 titled “A Visit from St. Nicholas”. This poem, later attributed to Clement Clarke Moore, is what we now refer to as “The Night Before Christmas”. It provided us with the little old man, so lively and quick, along with the description of his mode of transport (the sleigh), and the names of his eight tiny reindeer. Santa still deserves a place in our lives today and should be there for times yet to come. This is hope. The fear is that the “book banners” and the “realists” will eliminate fantasy from the world, much as they have eliminated parts of history that are “inconvenient” or might “insult” those who have differing views. This is the fear.

Trees – I really have no understanding of how or why the tree has become an important part of Christmas. I can only hope that it remains important in the future. I recognize, however, that the tree faces much controversy. The biggest threat to the Christmas tree is the survival of families and friendship. If these things do not survive, then the need for a Christmas tree will no longer exist. Such as loss would be devastating. The second threat to the Christmas tree is a more subtle change to society. As we move toward environmental awareness, we face challenges in how we retain tradition. On a small scale, almost insignificant in my view, the use of Christmas trees threatens our environment. To use live trees, we take away their ability to provide the benefits of trees left to grow. If we use artificial trees, we waste resources in their creation and create trash to be dealt with when the trees are no longer needed.

The Christmas tree really presents both hope and fear. Hopefully, we as humans can face and resolve the need to balance this challenge.

Gifts or Presents – Much like Christmas trees, gifts and presents in the times yet to come present challenges. Sometimes I think that my generation has failed our children. We did not create the world, but we seem to have changed it in a way that has caused irreversible problems. How did we do this? We created the world of entitlement. A world where there were no winners or losers, ignoring the fact that to have a winner you must also have a loser. A world where a person deserves something simply because another has it. A world where can live in a castle, travel without financial cares, and be unlimited in their desires. Such a world seems wonderful, almost Eden-like. But is it realistic?

This has led to a world where the value of a gift is no longer judged by the love or caring it represents but instead by the cost. I am realistic enough to recognize that we cannot return to the time that a gift of a few pieces of candy was treasured as much as one of a pricy toy. At the same time, I hope that we can return to a time where it is recognized that we cannot always have what we want. If this means that gifts are a fear, so be it.

Trains – I suspect that the time of trains at Christmas has come and gone. Much of the romanticism of trains which was common in my youth no longer exists. My hope here is that our future can replace the trains of the past with something as valuable to our future. While it may seem strange, as someone who worked for many years in the technology field, I do not believe our electronics can fill this role. My hope is that we can replace trains with something which contributes to the days yet to come. Perhaps a replacement might be to plant a sapling and helping it grow or sharing our heritage and emphasizing the positive rather than concentrating on things gone wrong. There is hope but there is also the fear that the time and opportunity for this to happen has passed us by.

Parades – There will always be a place in my heart for parades. Much like Santa, they provide us a moment of fantasy. Could the things on that float ever become real? Could I ever play music like that band? What other fantasies do parades offer others?

In my childhood, I could not imagine a time where there were no parades. Yet today and in the future, parades face many challenges – cost, time, convenience, safety, the list goes on. Parades are not limited to Christmas time. I recently read where a large city was cancelling there Fourth of July parade next year; a parade that has been held in one form or another since the late 1800’s. Will the same fate await the Christmas parade. I hope not, but I fear so. Not because of the reasons above but instead because of political correctness. Because of things that may have happened over 200 years ago and not even in this city It is a shame. Something that will probably never be returned if it is lost.

Snow – Snow is the one thing that we cannot control. My hope is that climate change will never stop the snow. I hope we can always wish for a white Christmas. I fear that here, the environmentalists may be right. Let us hope not.

As I end this short series of posts, I want to thank Charles Dickens for his inspiration. I thank Ebenezer Scrooge, at least after his enlightenment, and Jacob Marley. I thank Dickens’ spirits. And I thank my wife and those around me. I thank our two cats, whether they are trying to show their independence or their love. I hope that you, too, will think about your Christmases – past, present, and yet to come. And, I hope that they will be merry both now and in the future.

Views of Christmas Present

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This is the second of three posts regarding the Christmas season. As stated in yesterday’s post, “Thoughts of Christmas Past”, these posts were inspired by the visits of ghosts in Charles Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol’ which was originally published in1843. In his novella, Dickens told of Christmas Past, Christmas Present, and Christmas Yet to Come. My titles vary slightly as do the thoughts, memories, and opinions. Perhaps yesterday’s post could have been titled “Memories of …” instead of “Thoughts of …” because it was based on memories of my childhood.

Whether right or wrong, I decided to title today’s post “Views of …” to reflect that these are not memories nor opinions but are more at how I look at the world outside my door today. It is a bit harder to write because yesterday’s blog was based on my youth in a very small town – a place where I have not lived since the 1970’s. Instead, this is what I see daily in the large city, not my home but near enough that it affects my daily life. I hope you can forgive this and will think about the differences as they might affect both you and others. I have attempted to retain the same sub-themes for consistency may not always be successful.

Family – The family, as a unit, has undergone many changes since my childhood. Perhaps, these changes began before my birth as soldiers returned from WW II and found the country different from what they had left only a short time before. While this may be true in large cities as well, it became more apparent in rural America. Mechanization and other advances led to the demise of many small farms and the businesses that supported them. Many were forced to flee to cities for jobs. This all in the face of the “baby boom” – larger families, a need for better economic opportunity, and the ability to provide housing for families.

The result could have been predicted. As physical separation of families grew more common, the ability for large family gatherings on Christmas and other holidays decreased. At the same time, views of the world around us became more diverse.

These changes are continuing today. Demands for time have become greater. While it was simple to have a weekend gathering of family in the past, it is much more difficult today.  Family activities, work, friends, and other things all challenge us to balance where we can be, when, and for how long.

Recently, a new challenge has faced families – political realm. This can involve things like political correctness where things that were taken for granted in the past now have become a basis for judgement. This seems most prevalent when comparing the views of progressives, or the so-called “woke”, with those of the more conservative. Even more significant is the hatred or mistrust, instilled by or encouraged by the media, based on voting for or against a candidate or an issue. Things have deteriorated to the point where some families have cancelled holiday gatherings because they believe political arguments may degrade the gathering into fights, either intellectual or physical. These views have been encouraged by the media through such proposals as “cancelling Thanksgiving” which will probably happen to Christmas as well and refusing to “break bread” with anyone who votes differently. I have yet to see any media suggestion that the Christmas season should be a time to come together rather than time to pull apart.

So where does this leave the family? Today, it is far from anything I saw as a child. Can the family unit even survive? Survival is dependent on recognizing that these things are not as important as those around us, our families and our friends. Perhaps it is time to take a break and step back, yet the media and its self-proclaimed experts on life cannot or will not allow this to happen.

Santa and His Helpers – I seldom see “Santa” today. He sometimes appears in a parade or possibly in a store, but he really seems to have disappeared or has at least elected to be elsewhere. This, too, I blame on our seemingly endless more toward political correctness. Never should anything exist or occur which might hurt someone’s feelings, whether justified or not.

I wonder if today’s children have heard the simple poem that we know as “The Night Before Christmas.” Although the poem was first published over 200 years ago, it is suddenly something bad. Why? It must be evil because it tells a story of an imaginary person or event. Or maybe it is because it tells of an event that could only have occurred in the home of a wealthy family. Or, hopefully, I am worrying too much and our children still get to hear or read this quaint poem written in a far different time with little or no editing for “correctness”. The same could be said for many of the works of Charles Dickens. After all, “A Christmas Carol” focuses on a man who was an evil miser and only changed his ways after visits from three ghosts.

Trees – Trees seem to be one of the few things that have changed very little. There are still those who love a live tree, or even a tree that can be replanted after Christmas. And there are those who enjoy having a green or white artificial tree, often with lights that do not need to be removed each year. There are apparently still a few who like the older “aluminum” trees, at least enough to justify advertising these trees online. At the same time, there are also those who want your tree to go away. People who say the trees contribute to the decline of our environment, or that the trees add to pollution because of electrical demand, or even that the trees discriminate because they are not fair to those who do not celebrate Christmas.

Gifts or Presents – I wonder if the entire concept of gifts at Christmas has lost its meaning. When I was young, gifts were given not of obligation, but instead as a way of showing love or friendship to another. Gifts were often small, but they still had meaning to both the giver and the recipient. Today gifts are given more from obligation. If we give gifts to two family peers, for example a son and a daughter, then we carefully take steps to ensure that the cost is the same. We worry when we do not provide a costly gift as opposed to a family heirloom. And, when asked for a gift suggestion or when we ask someone, “What might you like?”, we are often told of an item that is far outside what we are able to provide. Yet we will do everything we can to offer this gift even if we really feel it is not appropriate.  

Trains – I don’t believe that trains mean as much to our children today as they did in the past. This may be because trains today are far different from those of the past. Their role, other than in places like the northeast corridor have moved from a mixture of freight and passenger service to a role of freight only. In may places, passenger service has been gone for many years, replaced by better roads and automobiles. Even the romanticized little red caboose is rarely, if ever, seen other than in a museum. As a result, there is little to draw the attention of children. Electronics have also played a role; cell phones and games have become an integral part of day-to-day life for today’s children. So, what is there to draw them to trains.

Parades – Parades, much like trees, remain a part of traditional Christmas events. Yet these too have changed. While small town parades may have seen little of this change, the larger parades have become even more complex. I sometimes watch these larger parades and wonder how much more they will change. It seems that those in large cities have become more entertainment “events” catering to the broadcast media rather than parades catering to attendees? Also, since the parades are often held in downtown areas, has safety for attendees been considered?

Snow – Even today I suspect that children hope for a white Christmas. At the same time, I suspect that the adults often wish for the opposite.

So, as I close this post on Christmas present, I wish anyone who reads a happy holiday season no matter how you celebrate and for those of us who celebrate Christmas, a very merry one.

Thoughts of Christmas Past

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Perhaps I am not being politically correct, or woke, by using the words “Christmas Past” as opposed to saying, “Holidays Past.” If this is correct, I apologize to those who may be offended. No, I don’t offer apologies. My past is full of celebrations of Christmas. We recognized that some religions celebrate in different ways and respect that. But, for me and my family, we celebrated Christmas. Holidays had many meanings with Christmas, birthdays, and several other days being recognized as holidays for most Americans.

My thoughts here focus mainly on days, events, activities, and more which mostly occurred when I was a young child although some also occurred in my teen years. Things then were different than today. Life seems as though it may have been much simpler, but when I say this, it may be because it was viewed through a child’s eyes. Your memories may be different because each of us had unique lives. I was raised in a small town in rural Arkansas where the focus was agriculture. Many events that we enjoyed were in a small city a few miles away. I suspect the lives of children in large cities were vastly different from mine. The memories here may change over time but reflect what is important to me today.

Family – Family was important at Christmas. Early on Christmas morning, we arose and opened presents in our living room where the Christmas tree was located. This was followed by a trip to my maternal grandmother’s home. While some of my uncles lived far away and could not be there each year, those who lived locally were always there. We typically had a large, pot-luck dinner and then opened presents near the Christmas tree. We returned home late in the afternoon. I don’t remember visiting my paternal grandparent’s the same way. Perhaps this was because they lived next door. Or maybe it was because my paternal grandmother passed away when I was ten years old followed by my grandfather when was fourteen. Still, we tried to see them and my uncle’s family who lived just down the street on either Christmas Eve or Christmas Day.

Christmas was one of the few holidays that we could be sure my father would be with the family. He never had work on Christmas Day. Other holidays, which might fall during the busy agriculture season might require him to work but never Christmas. This made it even more special.

Santa’s Helpers – Like almost every child of my age, I was taught about Santa Claus from my earliest years. He was this nice gentleman with a white beard, a red suit, who came down your chimney each year to leave presents for good little girls and boys. He had innumerable elves who worked for him creating the presents and he travelled by a flying sleigh pulled by eight tiny reindeer. It never occurred to us that many of these things were illogical. How could he visit everyone on a single night? What would happen if your home did not have a chimney? And, if his sleigh could fly, why did he need those reindeer?

Each year, our town had a community Christmas gathering that was held in the high school gymnasium. Adults had the opportunity for social interaction and the children went home with gifts from Santa. Yes, Santa was there each year – red suit, white beard, and all. But we never saw the sleigh.

This event made me realize that to do all the things he was credited with Santa must have needed helpers. Helpers who dressed like him and brought presents to good boys and girls. I was only about four or five at the time. What caused this realization? My parents were driving us to the celebration and running a few minutes late. As we entered the parking lot, we saw a neighbor’s pickup truck just ahead of us. And who should get out of the truck? No less that Santa. And I recognized the truck and told my parents that it could not be Santa driving that truck. How could that be? I give my mother credit for quick thinking since she explained to me that Santa could not be everywhere at one time so he had helpers that took his place delivering gifts and they borrowed trucks or cars from older families with grown children so they would not need sleighs. This didn’t answer the many other questions about Santa but for a young child it was enough. I was simply happy enough to go inside, meet Santa’s helper, and get my gift. But even today, I wonder how Santa, or one of his helpers could get into a house with no chimney.

Trees – The first Christmas trees I remember were live trees. I don’t remember if they were purchased at a local store or farmer’s market or if they were cut from a local forest.  While my memory is not clear about this, they were small, probably no more than four or five feet tall. The number of ornaments was probably not large but there were many lights and lots of tinsel. The first artificial tree was quite different. It was about the same height but had branches made from wood and thin pieces of something like aluminum foil very similar to tinsel although a bit larger. There was no green to be seen. While the ornaments were still used but the electric lights were now a fire hazard and stayed in their boxes. For light, a spinning wheel of four colors was used with a spotlight behind it. This was placed on the floor near the tree and shined up into the tree. When I looked today, I still saw trees like this available online. I don’t remember ever having another live tree although the first artificial tree was replaced with an artificial green tree and lights were purchased that could be used.

Gifts or Presents – Presents were never large but were selected and given with love and with care. When I was very young, they were often toys but as I aged the toys were commonly replaced by clothes or things more useful. Some of my favorite toys were tractors and attachments from the local John Deere dealer where my father worked. These toys were sturdy, or maybe a better word is rugged, and spent many hours being played with both indoors and in the outdoor sandbox. Similar toys can still be purchased today in almost any large department store, but the quality is not the same. Oh, how I wish I had kept those toy tractors given the prices that toys of that vintage command today.

Trains – Like many young boys, and maybe some young girls, I loved trains. A railroad ran through our town, and I was always happy to watch the trains as they passed by. Just like real trains, toy trains were always fun whether pull toys, wind-up toys, or electric trains. Even trains in books. Do you remember “The Little Engine That Could”? In the nearby city, the Firestone tire dealership sold Lionel trains (yes, Lionel has been around that long). Each year for a few weeks before Christmas they installed a Lionel layout at the front of the store. It was simple, just a loop of track, or maybe two, on a table. In the center of the loop, there were a few shelves for displaying individual train cars or accessories. But the exciting part were the trains that ran around the circle. After what seems to be years of wishing, I got my first train set. It was simple – an “diesel locomotive, a couple of cars, and a caboose along with a loop of track. Rather than an actual railroad name, the cars were labelled as “Lionel Lines”. I played with it for years until it finally wore out from use.

Parades – Our town was so small that we did not have a Christmas parade. Instead, we went to the nearby city to see their parade. It probably wasn’t a huge parade although it seemed that way to a small child. A few high school bands marched in the parade along with the band from the local college. There were also a few floats and some other marching units. While all was enjoyable, the thing I remember most is the ROTC Drill Team from the college. They had brightly polished helmets and carried military rifles. They twirled their rifles and did other drill moves that fascinated those watching them.

Snow – I can only remember once or twice in my childhood when we had a white Christmas. It really wasn’t expected but always wished for. There was nothing unique about this. It was true across much of the south. If we had snow, it usually came late in January or even later. I can, however, remember one Christmas that was white. It was not necessarily because of the snow itself but because of a family visiting some friends. Their kids were about the same age as I was, and they had never seen snow. Of course, that should have been expected because they had lived in Florida their entire lives.

“The Cat Who Saved Books” By Sosuke Natsukawa (A Book Review)

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I read for enjoyment. Sometimes I start a book and then stop because I am not enjoying the read although this does not happen often. More commonly I tend to take the time to savor what I am reading. This may include reading a short passage, a page or two or even a chapter, then taking a break to ponder what I have read. Occasionally I start a book and read it quickly then return to read selected passages that I found more interesting than others. But rarely do I find a book that it is very difficult to put down.

“The Cat Who Saved Books” was one of those rare treasures. The story was captivating. The translation by Louise Heal Kawai was excellent. The cover artwork by Yuko Shimizu was beautiful. I find it hard to say anything bad about this novel other than it was far too short.

I was visiting our local Barnes & Noble a few days ago browsing for a new book. Something that could be read for pure pleasure. I slowly cruised the “new releases” aisles in this quest. Initially I was having difficulty finding what I desired. During my first pass, I couldn’t seem to find what I wanted although Shimizu’s cover caught my eye. Even during a second trip around this area, there was no strong draw other than the same cover. As a cat lover, my thought was that the draw was the cat on the cover. But as I started a third trip through the “new arrivals,” I decided to pick up the book and read the synopsis. When I did, I found something there that told me I had to read this book. I am so glad that I did.

Back at home, I put the book on my nightstand for later reading. There it sat for a few hours. Then I began reading. Little did I expect that I would not put the book down, except for a few very short breaks, until it was finished.

The book opens with a young man, Rintaro, standing sadly at the funeral of his grandfather. The grandfather owned a used bookstore. A store with only a single aisle where books were shelved floor to ceiling, seemingly in no order at all. Yet his grandfather seemed to have known every book there and where it could be found. He had passed much of this knowledge to his grandson. Now, the grandson was expected to give up the bookstore to live with his aunt until he became an adult.

Little did anyone know that this was not to happen nor why. And they probably would not have believed it had they been told.

After the funeral, the boy returned to the bookstore to contemplate what had happened and what his future would be. As he sat, the bell outside the door rang. When he answered, no one was there, nor had anyone entered. Then he heard a deep voice talking to him. He looked for a person but instead saw only a cat. Could it be? A talking cat? Surely not, yet it was. The cat told the young man that it needed his help. There were books to be saved and only the young man and the cat could do it.

Once the cat convinced the young man to join him, the solid wood wall at the back of the bookstore opened and the adventure began. Through the book, the cat, Rintaro, and at least one other go to four labyrinths to save books. Each labyrinth is more challenging than the previous.

Will Rintaro and the cat succeed? How will this affect Rintaro’s future? Will the bookstore survive? Is this really a prediction of the end of books? To answer all these questions, you must read this book. As you read, be sure to watch for the words of wisdom, sometimes offered by the late grandfather and at others offered by Rintaro as his knowledge grows. I think you, too, will find the story enchanting and hard to put down. And you may find it exceptional as I did.

Another Day in the Lives of Cats

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Here I sit, a snowy morning two days after Thanksgiving. The elections are over, there was no need to cancel Thanksgiving as some had suggested. The world, and hopefully most families survived. The holiday season has begun. As we look forward to Christmas, or other holidays that you may celebrate, I thought I would take a look at the past few months and the lives of our cats since my last post about them.

In the earlier post, I reflected on a day in the lives of Joe and Leo, our two cats. At that time they were just over one year old and had lived with us for about a year. Today, they are nearing their second birthday, but otherwise much is the same.

The added year of their lives is not readily apparent although they each continue to develop distinct personalities. As littermates one might expect them to be quite similar but instead each is unique. Leo is the explorer and very rambunctious. Seeming to have little fear, he is ready to jump to or from great heights. One of his favorite “games” is to run out of our bedroom any time I open the door, then lay on the floor, expecting me to rub his tummy, pick him up, and return him to our room. He will zoom about the room with his brother or alone if no one wants to run with him. Joe is the more cautious of the two. While he enjoys many of the same things as his brother, he contemplates them before joining in. He loves to watch television, especially shows with other cats or dogs. We often wonder if he actually sees the shows or is simply responding to the sounds or the changing light. Joe is also a bit skeptical, often shying away when one tries to pet or cuddle him. Joe is, however, the most curious. He wants to explore and, often, toss to the floor things on our nightstands.

Oddly, neither of the two is highly loveable. They will often share our bed, but that does not include petting in the evening. They pick their space and we must adapt to that, otherwise they will leave. Yet they will return later, hoping to be unbothered by their humans.

As they continue to grow it will be interesting to see how they will change or stay the same. According to some charts they are now in the equivalent of a human teenager. In many respects this can be seen in their personalities – loveable yet sometimes disobedient; daring but cautious; sleepy but always ready to get up and zoom. Such are days in the lives of our cats.

A Day in the Life of Our Family Cats (An Edited Repost From Facebook)

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When I originally posted this in July 2024, it was after several more serious posts and was written to reduce stress, both mine and that of my readers, as something a bit off the wall, and something with a bit of humor.

I’m usually up somewhere between 5:30 and 6:30 each morning to do my daily chores. To our cats, the most important of these chores is feeding them and refilling their water bowl. Next in line is cleaning their litter box. I don’t need an alarm to wake me up in the mornings because the cats ensure that I know it is time to get out of bed. If I am not awake, they sit on the dresser and stare at me. If that doesn’t work they resort to racing from one side of our bedroom to the other, at full speed, often jumping on or over the bed with their favorite landing point being my legs or back.

Once I arise, they follow me step-by-step to ensure that I take their food bowls into the kitchen for filling. While I am filling their bowls, they again stare at me so that I don’t waste time or perform any unnecessary tasks like starting the coffee machine. After their bowls are filled, they follow me to make sure the bowls are returned to their proper place for eating. I dare not do anything prior to this.

Our day then proceeds in one of two ways. Most common is for them to eat, find a hiding place, curl up, and go back to sleep. The second is for one or both to jump on my desk and watch me use the computer to type posts like this or to work. There really isn’t enough space for both cats and the computer on the desk so they arrange themselves in whatever manner they prefer and often assist me by putting paws on the keyboard or moving the mouse so that it is not where I want it to be.

After deciding that they cannot both be on the desk simultaneously, either one or both leave the desk and move to a nearby window to look outside. Of course, this necessitates walking across the computer keyboard and adding their personal comments to anything being typed. Throughout the day, they alternate which, if either of them, sits or sleeps on the desk.

If their food bowls become empty (which means the bottom of the bowl can be seen in any way) they will let me know by again starting the racing game along with a loud “meooow” or two.

At the end of the day, they both disappear, back to their favorite hiding places for more sleep so that the races can begin again about the time we are ready for sleep, or more likely around midnight. After zooming around the room, they normally settle down and sleep so that the entire process can begin again the next morning.

Yesterday the cats were very confused. When I left for work my wife moved over to my side of the bed and went back to sleep. She rarely sleeps there. She said when she awakened one of the cats was simply staring at her. Then, he would move close to get petted and then back away and look at the place where she normally sleeps, as if to say, “Why aren’t you here, where you belong?” After a short time the cycle would repeat. Later in the morning, the second cat reacted about the same way. Seems that they don’t like change unless they approve ahead of time – LOL. By the way, two cats, brothers from the same litter, two totally different personalities, very independent, a little over a year old and full of energy.

The Old White House in the Country (A Short Story of My Past)

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This is not a work of fiction. Instead, it is written by a seventy-two-year-old man based on memories of his childhood. As a result, some things may be off regarding time, size, and other details. All rights to these materials are reserved although readers may share them provided they are appropriately attributed to the author.

After my wife and I had our Thanksgiving dinner last evening I thought about how much things had changed since I was young. A time when the holidays meant for families to gather and have conversation, played together, maybe even enjoyed a football game on either the radio or on television. When political events were not the subject on conversation, or at least, were no reason to end friendships or enjoy time together. Yes, things have changed, but not always for the better.

The old white house was located about four miles from the nearest town, in the center of fields and farmland used primarily for cotton but not anything even close to Tara or the other plantations so romantically described in literature and movies. It was a four-room house with attached porches on both the front and the back. I know little about the old house other than it, at some point, may have been inhabited by the landowner. I say this because the outbuildings around the house included sheds for storing seed and for smoking meat, a large building for chickens, and a mid-sized barn.

The white house was in a big yard with several really large white oak trees along with a few cedar trees. There were flowers of all types, from the tall, multi-colored hollyhocks to small daffodils, some in beds and some just scattered through out the yard. There were peach trees between the house and the large vegetable garden which was shared by the family each summer. From my earliest memories until the late nineteen-sixties, the house was inhabited only by my grandmother.

While there was electrical service to the house, there was no running water and, as a result, no indoor plumbing facilities. Heat, in the winter, was provided by a single, wood burning stove located in the living room. I also remember cooking being done on a wood burning kitchen stove in my early years although that stove was replaced by an electric range sometime in my childhood. The house was of simple design. It was basically a square, or perhaps a rectangle, divided into four smaller squares, the rooms. Each room was connected to the two adjacent rooms and the two front rooms opened onto the front porch while the two backrooms opened to the back porch. Each exterior wall had two windows, one in each room on that side of the house.

The house sat atop several concrete peers thus offering an open space about eighteen inches high under the house. Like I said earlier, there was no running water in the house. Instead, there was a hand pump a few feet outside the back door and water was pumped and carried into the house in buckets. Similarly, wood for the stoves was carried in a few pieces at a time from wood stored on the front porch or from wood stacks a bit farther away.

My grandmother’s family would be considered large today but at that time was probably common. She had four daughters, one who died early in her life, and four sons. All of her children were born in Tennessee, but the family moved to Arkansas when my mother was young. I never knew the reason but suspect it was because they could find work there. On holidays, it was common for the majority of my grandmother’s children to visit for at least one meal and often for the entire day. As the family grew older some were not able to visit every holiday because they had moved away but they were always welcomed when they could visit.

On these holidays not everyone could fit into the kitchen for eating so the children were often relegated to eat in another room or to eat later than the adults. One cousin and I were close to the same age, so we tended to play together. Most other cousins were several years older, so they also tended to visit together.

Near the white house, beside or amid the cotton fields were a large pecan tree and another large nut tree (I can’t remember the variety) where the men often collected nuts during the harvest season.

I will always remember the holidays as a great time for visiting with family. While we all had different lives, lived in different places, and had different friends, we were also family and could share things with each other. I remember times that were not so great and times that were truly celebrations. And from these things, we became closer as a family. I even remember some funny events, like the time when an in-law brought an apple pie for the holidays. When she arrived, she asked who had brought the ice cream to go with it. When no one answered, she said, “Well, I’ll just put my pie back into the car since you can’t eat pie without ice cream!” Of course, this led to many jokes as the story was repeated for many years after.

The old white house is no longer there. Nor are the fields where cotton, and later soybeans, grew. If fact, the area is no longer in the country. The city has grown, and all of this space has been absorbed. The old gravel roads have been paved and now have now have street names. But the memories remain, at least for the few of us who were around then and are still around now. But our numbers dwindle, just as do the memories. Hopefully, today’s children are building there own memories to share with those who follow and not all memories will be left forever on machines and in social media.

I hope that readers and their families had a chance to get together on Thanksgiving. If not, I hope you still had a happy holiday. And, with some luck, you had ice cream to go with your pie. Enjoy the holiday season and many more.

Entitlement

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I believe that most of us who are parents recognize that this role encompasses many things. We must take care of our children’s needs, especially when they are young. We should teach them right and wrong. We should teach them about responsibility. We should teach them many other things.

And at some point, we should teach them what it means to be an adult and especially what they will need to do for their children should they too become parents. Even if they choose not to be parents, their role as adults will be far different from that of children.

For many, both parents and children, both teaching and learning seems to be simple. While I am sure they face challenges, these challenges are more simple than they are for others. And, although they can be simple, some parts are more important than others.

Unfortunately, I believe that parents from my generation have failed in some areas. While we learned that life would have challenges, that there would be winners and losers, and that just becoming an adult did not automatically afford privilege equally. Instead of teaching this, we fell into the trap of teaching entitlement. Our children were taught that they were entitled to simple things like the best toys, the best clothes, everything that their friends possessed. They were not taught that not every parent could afford, monetarily or otherwise, the same things.

They were taught that in sports everyone was entitled to be on the team. And because they were on the team, everyone was entitled to equal playing time regardless of talent. They were taught that there were no winners or losers. Instead, everyone deserved the same trophy or reward. This sounds good on the surface but when you look at it more closely it does not reflect the real world they would live in as adults.

As our children grew older, they continued to feel entitled. And they wanted to give their children the same or more than was given to them. This continues even today. The problem has become that while everyone feels entitled in their youth, they seem to expect this in adulthood which is unrealistic.

An example is the current administration’s effort to eliminate student debt. When I went to college, my parents and I paid for my schooling. I worked during the school year and in the summers. I did not study abroad – I could not afford that. And yet today, as an American taxpayer, I am being expected to pay for the education of those who elected to incur indebtedness and now cannot repay that debt. Not everyone is entitled to go to college. Not everyone is entitled to a student loan. These are things that one must earn.

In another situation, a person who was working at a low-level job decided that they were entitled to a trip to Hawaii, not because they had enough money to afford the trip, but instead because one of their friends had taken a similar trip. This person then expected someone else to pay for the trip including of their personal expenses.

So, perhaps, our generation has contributed to the issue by creating this environment of entitlement. But at the same time, our children are old enough now to recognize that entitlement comes at a cost and the world is not always fair. For most of us, this means accepting what life throws at us and living within those constraints. If our children decide to live a different lifestyle, then that was their choice, but they should not expect us to support that lifestyle. We supported them as children, they need to support themselves now.

Quilting

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I saw a post on another social media site this morning titled “Murphy’s Laws of Quilting.” This post reminded me of my late grandmother and how things were in her home.

My grandmother passed away in 1970, just a few weeks after I started college. Unfortunately I was unable to attend her funeral services because I could not make the trip home. But I remember much about her. One of the earliest pictures that I have of me as a child is one standing in her yard with her. She lived in a small, four room home on a cotton farm a few miles outside the nearest town until just a few months before her death. The home did not have running water and was heated by a wood stove. She had an electric stove for cooking her last few years there but I can remember when she also had a wood stove for cooking. On most days she lived alone although she was visited almost every evening by one or more of her children and most of the family visited on one, or both, days each weekend.

While she had an old pedal driven Singer sewing machine, most of her sewing was on quilts and done by hand. The majority of her living room space was covered by a quilting frame below the single light hanging on an electric wire providing light for the entire room. The frame was suspended from the ceiling by ropes at each corner. She would start her quilting on one side of the quilt and as she proceeded across the quilt the frame could be adjusted so that she worked close to her chair. The final step was for her to sew hems on each side of the quilt. When visitors came, the frame could be raised to make more space in the living room and to protect the quilt from damage.

As far as I know, she did not make the tops of the quilts. Other members of the family made these and took them to her to be quilted which could be a lengthy process depending on how many were waiting to be completed.

I still have one or two of the quilts made on this frame today although age is beginning to take its toll. These quilts were used, not put away for posterity. I think back on spending nights with my grandmother, sometimes alone and other times with cousins. We knew not to disturb the quilts while they were being completed.

I always remember visiting my grandmother as an enjoyable time although I’m sure there were at least some visits that may have been less so. The biggest challenges I remember were pumping water by hand and having to use the “outhouse”, especially in the winter.

I hope you have similar memories of times with your grandparents.